Saturday, March 10, 2007
Thursday, March 08, 2007
Rockin' It....Hard
So far you mentioned AC/DC, Skynyrd, Zep, Def Leppard, Foghat, and Bon Jovi. In you're frenzy to out bone each other you missed one. Critically.
Eat it bitches
Eat it bitches
BONE'D
I don’t know what the fuck you guys are talking about.... bla bla bla classic rock sucks! As a card carrying member of 107.7 THE BONE I take offence to your baseless accusations. Sure I may have joined because I wanted to help choose the new Bone Rock Girl. (Eventually Jaime won… I would have picked someone else as I felt that her skank factor was a little low to carry an official moniker with “BONE” in it but what do I know.)Perhaps I have a secret love for classic rock? Now, I do agree with Coop in that they seem to only play the same 20 songs over and over and I am aware of studies that have shown prolonged exposure to Thursdays rock blocks can lead to cerebral hemorrhaging but most side effects are mild to moderate. But come on if these bands were putting out new music then they wouldn't be classic now would they? Besides other radio stations play the same 20 songs over and over and then throw in the occasional 80’s lunch box or Friday flashback to cover up the fact that their programming list is lacking. I should never have to hear anything from Live’s Throwing Copper ever. There is no excuse for that. And yet anytime I decide to turn off the IPod and check the airwaves to see if there is something out there that I’m missing within 5 minutes or 2 station switches there it is … Fucking Lightning Crashes. Fuck I hate that song.
Where I have a problem is when you start hearing bands that have no place on a classic rock station. Yes, while tired and overplayed the Stones, Zeppelin, and Skynard are all expected but Motley Crue…? Nirvana…? Poison…? Funny yes, amusing indeed, but classic no sir I think not. I’ve even heard U2 on the Bone, what is U2 even doing on that station? They not even in the same genre of music.
It’s like ITunes suggesting that if you like The Crystal Method you’ll probably like Sara McLachlan or my other fave if you likes The Artic Monkeys you might like Dr. Laura Schlessinger, who is making these connections? It boggles the mind.
Ahhhhh screw it all, I’m going to go listen to some Bon Jovi.
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
Bone Flashback
Can I comment on Herr Cooper's post here? Is that kosher? Fuck it, he opened the wound so you all get to taste the blood.
San Jose had (has?) a classic rock radio station also with the "Bone" appellation. I used to punch myself in the nuts whenever I would turn it on and ACDC was the first thing I heard. Let's just say I had sore balls. I will find the guy that's holed up in some Kansas bunker with his hideous Akira-esque classic-rock tentacles feeding the same fucking shit to every "Bone" in the country and I will smite him. I would like to borrow your BFR to lodge in his ass while it plays Burzum. We'll talk. Thank you.
Ka-ne-daaaa!
San Jose had (has?) a classic rock radio station also with the "Bone" appellation. I used to punch myself in the nuts whenever I would turn it on and ACDC was the first thing I heard. Let's just say I had sore balls. I will find the guy that's holed up in some Kansas bunker with his hideous Akira-esque classic-rock tentacles feeding the same fucking shit to every "Bone" in the country and I will smite him. I would like to borrow your BFR to lodge in his ass while it plays Burzum. We'll talk. Thank you.
Ka-ne-daaaa!
Monday, March 05, 2007
Winning the Arms Race for Audio Supremacy at Work
So, I work at a manufacturing plant with lots of heavy machinery, forklifts with their beeping back-up signals, welders popping and sizzling when cutting or joining metal. Along with these noises comes the constant sound of Dallas' own 93.3 The Bone. Now I like classic rock in small doses but I can only hear Led Zeppelin's "Immigrant Song", "Kashmir", "Stairway to Heaven" so many times before I have daydreams in differing hues of red. Foghat is nice but not every hour during a repeat playlist. ZZ Top and AC/DC are also good but I do not want to hear every fucking song they ever made in the course of one day...for five straight days.
So, I work near the heaviest and thus loudest of all the machinery in the whole shop and need something to get over that noise as well as Steely Dan songs. I had searched high and low for something to both bring music to my ears over the noise of the deafening roar of a 36" lathe cutting metal, and a hone that once was aboard a battleship used to smooth out the bores of naval cannon and now polishes the inside of pipes as well as pretty much gain aural hegemony in the workplace. And it had to have an AUX jack for my iPod so I can return the favor to my co-workers and inflict upon them my music tastes in return for theirs.
What did I find at Fry's normally marked $320 but was reduced to $120 as an open box return sans remote? Yes that's right...The JVC KaBoom!.
It is essentially two subwoofers attached to a small radio and is the neutron bomb of portable audio. This thing will make women have miscarriages, hearts palpitate, and, more importantly, fills the air with the soundtrack from "2001: A Space Odyssey" at such a volume that no one dare try and compete with their radio even when Eric Clapton's "Cocaine" comes on. Co-workers were in awe as the first notes of The Misfits' "Last Caress" wafted through the building followed by such eclectic selections as "La Habanera" from Bizet's opera "Carmen" and three different covers of Gary Glitter's "Do You Wanna Touch Me (There)?" by Crud, Joan Jett, and The Bobbyteens. My coworkers would in vain escalate and turn their radios up to challenge my B.F.R. only to have me inch up the subwoofers separate volume control and then the main volume; my iPod was already set for optimal bass. Game...set...match, bitches!
Soon, they were reduced to cowering around their puny radios, like homeless around a burning trash barrel for warmth, to hear anything by .38 Special, Stevie Ray Vaughn, or John Mellencamp (before he added the Cougar then dropped it then added it again...I think, but I can't keep up with shiftless people and their names) and escape the unrelenting onslaught of Metallica, Wagner (Das Rheingold), The Ramones and Willie Nelson iPod playlists.
As Conan said, the greatest joys in life are, "To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their women." I would add to this list the gnashing of teeth, rending of clothes, and beating of chests out of despair and now, begging for rather than an audio free-for-all as what is now the case, the other employees have conspired and asked the plant manager about each person being designated a day when they pick the radio station to be played over the company PA and disallow any personal audio devices. Ahhh! The tears of your defeat are sweeter than ambrosia my fellow hirelings!
So, I work near the heaviest and thus loudest of all the machinery in the whole shop and need something to get over that noise as well as Steely Dan songs. I had searched high and low for something to both bring music to my ears over the noise of the deafening roar of a 36" lathe cutting metal, and a hone that once was aboard a battleship used to smooth out the bores of naval cannon and now polishes the inside of pipes as well as pretty much gain aural hegemony in the workplace. And it had to have an AUX jack for my iPod so I can return the favor to my co-workers and inflict upon them my music tastes in return for theirs.
What did I find at Fry's normally marked $320 but was reduced to $120 as an open box return sans remote? Yes that's right...The JVC KaBoom!.
It is essentially two subwoofers attached to a small radio and is the neutron bomb of portable audio. This thing will make women have miscarriages, hearts palpitate, and, more importantly, fills the air with the soundtrack from "2001: A Space Odyssey" at such a volume that no one dare try and compete with their radio even when Eric Clapton's "Cocaine" comes on. Co-workers were in awe as the first notes of The Misfits' "Last Caress" wafted through the building followed by such eclectic selections as "La Habanera" from Bizet's opera "Carmen" and three different covers of Gary Glitter's "Do You Wanna Touch Me (There)?" by Crud, Joan Jett, and The Bobbyteens. My coworkers would in vain escalate and turn their radios up to challenge my B.F.R. only to have me inch up the subwoofers separate volume control and then the main volume; my iPod was already set for optimal bass. Game...set...match, bitches!
Soon, they were reduced to cowering around their puny radios, like homeless around a burning trash barrel for warmth, to hear anything by .38 Special, Stevie Ray Vaughn, or John Mellencamp (before he added the Cougar then dropped it then added it again...I think, but I can't keep up with shiftless people and their names) and escape the unrelenting onslaught of Metallica, Wagner (Das Rheingold), The Ramones and Willie Nelson iPod playlists.
As Conan said, the greatest joys in life are, "To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their women." I would add to this list the gnashing of teeth, rending of clothes, and beating of chests out of despair and now, begging for rather than an audio free-for-all as what is now the case, the other employees have conspired and asked the plant manager about each person being designated a day when they pick the radio station to be played over the company PA and disallow any personal audio devices. Ahhh! The tears of your defeat are sweeter than ambrosia my fellow hirelings!
Friday, March 02, 2007
Expectations
So I see Matty and Coop have signed up. Good things. I expect to see some posts from you two jokers soon. Don't disappoint, otherwise Matty, I'll put up another derogatory post about the Willis. That is all.
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