Squish Mitten

I am posting this for Dylan who apparently has a case of blog-o-phobia. It's debilitating.... We all need a little more Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo in our lives.

Game Thumb

In an ongoing effort to till my work productivity the guys game me a subscription to Gamefly for my birthday. So a big thank you goes out to them for that…. For those of you living two caves down from Osama, Gamefly is the gamer’s version of Netflix which is another work killer. One can spend countless hours on either site selecting or reviewing untold numbers of games or movies.

This was so cool that I had to go out and buy a PS2 to maximize my game playing potential over two separate platforms. (Just in time as well, because the Xbox kicked it just last week…. Hummmm $50 to replace the DVD drive or $499 to buy a 360… what to do, what to do) so now I can use this space to review games as well. Lucky you guys.

But Miguel you say, there are other perhaps more qualified sites that do that already. Perhaps indeed but those sites leave out key factors that you might want to know such as Ratchet & Clank: Up Your Arsenal causes seizures. Yup, I always thought seizures were an urban legend made up by parents to keep their kids mainlining Super Mario Bros. but its true. Not since the days of the original Wolfenstein has a game affected me in such a way.
Damn Obani Moon.

However, that said I fucking love this game and found it to have smooth game play, slick graphics, and a funny story line. Add to that the fact that JZ’s wife has beaten it 5 times gave me a little motivation to kick some Nefarious ass. Due to the upgradeable arsenal of weapons, ships, and armor there is an incentive to replay the game after you’ve finished the original story line which only adds to its value. I’m going to have to give this game 5 out of 5 stars, now if you'll excuse me I’m off to collect some sewer crystals...

This Should Close the Loop on That Whole Mess

I killed the video because I was tired of it playing in the background while reading Miguel's brilliance. I had autoplay set to false, I swear. Anyway, the Oozinator is old news. Now it's all about adding effects to Colbert in a grainy video acting like the Star Wars kid who had effects added to his original grainy video. The snake continues to eat his tail. Film at eleven.

Don't call it a comeback

Man this blog needs a little pick me up just about as badly as I do.

I went back to the gym yesterday for the first time since our cruse to Mexico. I know, I know that was almost a month ago. But I wanted to make sure that I was in shape for the cruse just in case the guys retaliated and gave me a banana sling of my own. Because if they did you know it would have come down to a double dog dare for me to wear it to the ships pool and you know Id have to do it as refusing a double dog dare is tantamount to social suicide. So, I wanted to look good # 1 to preserve whatever dignity one can while wearing a free from ball sack and #2 I thought if I rocked it maybe I cloud get some gay dudes to pay for the ridiculously overpriced ships drinks.

Anyway since then I think the blog and my 24... 12... 0k more like 8 inch guns haven’t received the love they need. Going back to the gym is always fun. I think I lost about 20 pounds and about 4 reps off my bench which means that putting up 150 may have caused some orbital hemorrhaging. Which was cool because they had an eye patch on hand, and for those who know me well know that I love a good eye patch.


This is all some kind of metaphor for saying that Ill try to be better about keeping the blog up to date and stuff. And I hope the other guys will as well.

For You Star Wars Fans

Somehow I missed this one...

Dr. Mr. Guy at the gym,

<-----Is not something that you need before going to the gym. Now I know that working out in a "wife beater" is cool and I have no problem with that. In fact, I'm sure you feel quite liberated in doing so. But why in the name B.A. Baracus would you feel the need to slather J+J's signature product all over you before coming. C'mon, nobody looks like that when they sweat. You were "glistening" and men don't do that. Anybody that's been in the gym for a bit can tell the difference between a sweater and an oiler. The oilers mysteriously have no other telltale signs of sweat just that shiny skin.
So really, why on the day you're doing squats would you come in with that stuff all over your shoulders. I call that out as a safety violation. Plus, I mean, c'mon, it's pretty much all guys in there anyway. I know you were trying to draw attention to your shiny man shoulders, but dude, oil?
I've seen some interesting folks at the gym: obviously the oilers, the girl at 24 hour fitness that had an adam's apple bigger than mine, neck chains guy at the world gym, speedo wearing, tear away pants guy at world gym...
You know, the more I think about it, a lot of these guys put on a show about being the ultimate tough guys. But when you show up in breakaway pants with a speedo underneath and then actually rip them off and pose...Or you show up in a tight-ass wife beater with baby oil slathered all over your body, you want the attention of the other guys in the room. Which is really kind of disturbing. When I go to the gym, I show up work out, and leave. Granted, thanks to Miguel, I do have a nice tangerine number that I could wear, but nobody wants to see that.
So listen all you gym freaks, leave the bedroom stuff at home. Please, for everybody. Leave your baby oil at home for use with your "special" movies. Chains and bondage really have no place in the gym.
And for all that is holy....
please...
no speedos.

FREE WEEKEND PLAY

This game is the Shiznit.... download it and play for free this weekend.