On the Rise: My level of boredom

So I’m watching Lucy Liu's new straight to video movie Rise: Blood Hunter. In this cinematic masterpiece she is apparently a would be journalist turned vampire, who... are you ready? Hunts and kills vampires! Damn where have we heard this story line before? So far it's only kind of lame and has not yet reached super lame, but don’t worry it’s getting there. Also Michael Chiklis has made an appearance sporting a wispy goatee. I think he’s a cop… go figure. But he hasn’t had any speaking lines yet so we’ll see where that goes.

There are some new twists on the genre:

These vampires don’t have fangs

There is a threesome involving necrophilia… that’s new.

As the “good” vampire Lucy is not above feeding oh hitchhikers.

No super human strength

They can walk in the daylight

Wow Nick Lachey and Marlon Manson have cameos

They can drink the blood of the dead

Lucy in fact does practice Santaria, but she still aint got no crystal ball.

Bring on the lame… the part where she discovers she’s a vampire an as she walks naked to the mirror in the morgue.. (they have mirrors in the morgue?) she conveniently doesn’t have a reflection! Ah ha you clever director types!

To be honest I’m not even sure these guys qualify as vampires… I mean other than the blood drinking and no reflection thing they’re really just undead. I’m just saying…